Right hand index finger

                Right hand index finger

Now concentrate on the index finger and try to understand all generalisations that you make about groups and society. You should always ask in a specific manner. Never
blame the entire group. Choose one which is responsible
for that. Whenever any question comes that they do not understand, then immediately ask, “Who among them?” If you feel that they are not going to give you a fair chance, then ask yourself who is not going to give you the fair chance. Exactly who the person is, who specifically are they? Again, if you see that your idea cannot work, then immediately ask which one of your ideas may not work. Again, if you hear that your plans cannot be
executed, then ask a simple question, “Which plan is not
working?” In my seminars I come across people who say
that their family members do not understand them at
all. I suggest to them to ask simple questions as to who
among their family does not understand them.

The bottom line is that you should not enhance your

problem. Look at the problem specifically and stay

focused.

Right hand middle finger

                                                          Right hand middle finger

Now let us move the middle
finger of the right hand. Whenever you tell yourself to do
something then ask yourself, “When? How? Where?” This
will provide you direction, pace, extent, and destination.
Brain does not understand unless we make a specific
command. Unless it is clear, brain will not consider it.
So whenever you feel depressed, ask yourself why you
feel depressed. In my seminars, especially in BPOs, I
always ask, “How do you get depressed?” The answer I
get is, “Pressure”. I simply ask, “Have you seen the life of
a student of class 3 or 4? They too have a lot of pressure,
such as peer pressure, pressure of the teachers, parents’

expectations, etc. Then they have fear of not performing,
fear of rejection from siblings, fear of being insulted in the

society by the teachers, parents, and friends. They have
to manage so many things and so many persons at the
same time. It is all about how you limit yourself. It is how
you create avenues for yourself to be depressed. In BPOs
especially, “stressed up” has become a fancy word. People
love to be called “stressed up”. Once I was conducting
a seminar for Tech Mahindra company and it was a
challenge to convince very senior level people that all
stress in our lives is the result of our false assumptions. We
have developed the culture of stress. In this situation, just
ask yourself how you have become stressed up. You will
find a particular pattern in your behaviour like shoulder
down, eyes down, etc. Again if you ask yourself that you want to take a new
project, then immediately ask, “How? When? Where?”
This will provoke you to take massive actions for your
project which will enhance your thinking and provide
an opportunity to excel. Mere thinking and dreaming
cannot shape your destiny and cannot do anything for
you. Success is always buried next to frustration. The
fire resembles the problem: the problem which might kill
persons, the problem which can physically harm. If you
want to improve your designation, visualise that you have
attained that designation by taking your eye in the right
direction.

Right hand ring finger

Right hand ring finger

Now let us concentrate on the ring finger of the right hand, 100% denied. If anybody denies 100%, then do not ask why, as even a thief or a criminal or any antisocial element has a 100% valid reason for doing a crime. Even in hypnosis, we never ask the question “Why?” We always ask them what will be the result in case you do not take that action. I ask in my seminars what will happen if you do not love your wife. Of course I get theanswer, “If I do not love my wife then somebody else will do so.”In case you are not willing to work, then ask yourself what will be the result if you do not work. The picture of the consequences will force you to work, or the picture of the result will force you to take a decision. Again, needless to say, this will prepare you to face the result.

communication

                communication

Right hand little finger—Let us position 100% irrelevant facts on the little finger of the right hand. These are those facts that do not exist in reality, but we have accepted them as a matter of fact and our life is governed by them. It means we are governed by our self created world of limitations and constraints. These limitations stop us from moving forward and, furthermore, sabotage our success. Now whenever a situation comes, then concentrate it on the little finger of your left hand. If your perception is not filtered properly, then it will not allow you to move forward, rather it will create an avenue to move away. Unless we stop generalising, deleting, and distorting the meaning of an event, any happening won’t be providing a new possibility. You can refer to the following-

100% bluff—Sometimes we say that kids today have no manners. By making this statement, we create an emotion which is negative. With the sound of this statement, our physiology goes down. Our behaviour gets affected. At this moment, ask yourself by raising little finger of left hand—is it really 100%? An answer from your subconscious will come, i.e., “No”. It is not 100%, rather we have made it 100% as a result of our own perceptions.Suppose you are moving in your car and suddenly a rickshaw puller comes in front. Within a fraction of moment you exclaim, “You all Biharis have no sense.” Again you say, “Oh Bihari get lost.” Here you are creating an identity about the people of Bihar. You are creating a bluff as if every person from Bihar is a rickshaw puller. It is not at all the reality. Do you think it is reality? No. Now next time, in case event. Map is not the territory. Even behaviour of a single person changes with the passage of time. As we know there is an old saying “time and tide changes every moment”.Similarly, you may believe that all secretaries have affairs with their bosses or seniors. So whichever office you go to, you will assume that there also secretaries and their bosses are having affairs. You will start matching their relationship wherever you go. You will focus on their age, on their looks and so on. You will forget your basic job for which you went there. Your attention will be diverted
to some other direction which is, of course, not relevant to you.you go to meet an IAS officer and you find he is from Bihar, it is needless to say that you will not be able to develop a positive rapport with him. Poor image about Biharis will not allow youto be natural and your communication process will be incomplete. Now concentrate on the little finger of your left hand and ask yourself, “Are all Biharis rickshaw pullers?” You will get the answer from your subconscious mind. “No. This is not the reality.” Remember, every event is a single Again, many women say, “All men are bastard.” In my seminar, I asked a girl what her idea about her father was. She could not say anything. At this point of time, you ask the little finger of your left hand is it really 100% true, you will get the answer, “No”. In fact, you are making a lie or simply perception to 100% truth. And you will
notice that your emotions are not in control.You suffer from pain, and you make your assumptions in poor state, because of your own belief system. I can
bet it never exists in reality. If you make full truth from half truth or no truth, you start believing your doubt and doubting your belief. This kills your way of life and shapes your behaviour that stops you from taking actions. Again, some bosses say that their subordinates never work. They should ask themselves, “Really?” The answer of this question will be “No.” By doing this, they will feel ecstatic. And they will realise that not all subordinates are lazy, rather most of them work hard and are responsible for making them the boss. Most people say that all politicians
are useless. Remember this will not allow you to grow and respect your country. I found in India that most people hate politicians but they always talk about politics.We know about the behaviour of a person in a particular context and we judge him from that instance. Remember, a person’s behaviour is contextual and it changes as the context changes.

FILTER YOUR FILTERS

FILTER YOUR FILTERS 

Many a times our self condemnation stops us from taking actions. Sometimes our technique of asking questions creates hindrances in our life. We all know that the quality of life is nothing but the quality of questions that we ask to ourselves and others. The message of communication should teach us how to communicate with others. If you and I want to communicate internally with a positive frame of mind, then we must know the technique of filtering our negative perceptions. Then only can we

communicate with ourselves. We know that we need to communicate with ourselves first and then we communicate with the world

Fatigue is a state of mind

                                    Fatigue is a state of mind

According to Shiv Sutra our brain is divided into two parts, right and left. The right part constructs and left part maintains. Right brain imagines and left brain provides reference points. Reference is like a support system. Similarly, moving the eyes in the right direction focus something which does not exist and moving them towards the left shifts our focus to something which does exist. The communication system of Ratan Tata is clear. He generally looks ahead with his eyes towards the right direction. Look at him, he looks pretty young. He does not have time to think about anything which is not productive. Ratan Tata is also known for his vision. We
must know how to change ourself with experiences and
perceptions for breaking our limiting behaviour.

Let’s Understand Our Communication Patterns and Nervous System Scientifically

Let’s Understand Our Communication

Patterns and Nervous System Scientifically

 

Muscles

Our bones and joints are covered with muscles. Muscles form 50% of our body weight and collectively. Muscles are of two work types:

•Voluntary
• Non-voluntary

(i)                 The voluntary muscles move as per our desires and our commands. They wait for commands from the nervous system. These muscles are found in hands, legs, stomach, head, mouth, cheeks, etc.

(ii)              Non-voluntary muscles are found in eye balls,
      pupils, blood veins, food pipe and heart.

We will discuss about non-voluntary muscles in detail  in the chapter Catch the Liars”.

Our eye has a retina. The retina is like a reel on which
the picture is taken. The lens in the eyes takes the picture.
This picture is always opposite. After the picture has been
taken, it is the job of the nervous system to develop this
picture and give meaning to it. This is the place where
we can change the meaning and frame according to our
desire. It is true that most of the people limit themselves
by generalising the event, sometimes they never allow
lenses to take the picture, they distort the meaning, and
finally they delete it from the reel. By doing this, they
reject an opportunity.

In the above generalisation, distortion, and deletion are done on the basis of the filters that we create in our nervous system. These filters are our own language, our own sounds, our own past experiences, and our own perceptions about events and happenings, our past belief about the pattern of happenings, and our past attitudes about events.

An event has no meaning except the meaning we give
to it. If we use our filters in a better way, then we can reach
the zenith without any doubt. In fact, our filters create the
internal presentation of the event and hence our state is
created, subsequently physiology takes place. Our world is
framed and then our internal and external world is created.
This world helps us create our behaviour.

In our life we can do everything if we follow the scientific pattern of thinking and doing. We must know how to use our brain cells. We don’t get tired because we are actually tired but because of our pattern of thinking. It is because of the pattern of filters that we use.

The pattern of the state makes the pattern of the world. And subsequently the pattern of the world creates our behaviour.Hope is the first thing to take some sort of action I do my corporate programmes for 14 to 15 hours continuously and nobody gets tired. In one of my open
house programme “Discover the Power Within” at Hotel Taj
Mansingh, New Delhi, a very enthusiastic participant came up to me the next day and said, “I danced the whole day.
I attended the whole programme. I did firewalk almost

18 feet long and then went to office in the night for work after 15 hours of programme.” He went back home and the next day he came on time and rocked the seminar with a lot of ecstasy and playfulness again

KNOW YOUR MIND

KNOW YOUR MIND 

Neuro Communication Model

Value is not intrinsic; it is not in things. It is within us; it is the way in which man reacts to the conditions of his environment.Ludwig von Mises

In this chapter I will explain: How does our nervous system work? How are the nerves esponsible for our behaviour? How is our behaviour shaped as per the meaning that we give to an event? An event has no meaning except the meaning that we give to it.By changing the picture of the event, by changing the sound of the event, by changing the feeling of the event we can change the entire meaning of the event. Framing of an event means we provide a guide to the event, it provides a limit. Whatever we see, feel, and hear is anchored in our mind and body. Whenever we wish to see, listen, and feel to change our old patterns we can always get the new patterns. It would be very easy in case you are in a peak state. For example, if you met with an accident and you narrowly escaped, you will always remember that spot whenever you pass through that site. It will get anchored in your mind, body, and emotions very intensively.

 Our entire

Make Life Purposeful

Make Life Purposeful

Ask yourself some quality questions for shaping your destiny. It is the quality of the internal communication that decides the external destination. Every individual can become anything that he desires to be, but for that he has to ask the following quality questions to himself consistently.Who am I? • Where am I? • Why am I here? • What do I do? • How do I do? • What are the ways? • Why do I do this in this particular way as I am doing now? • What is my mission, vision, objective, and goal? • What am I doing for reaching there?Let’s not forget that, with all due respect to each of our dreams and desires, we should work towards the betterment of our society and the progress of our country. At any cost we should not do anything against the organisation, corporation, and country from where we have earned our identity. We all know that Vibhishana did everything for Rama but nobody today names their son Vibhishana because his work was against his own organisation. Even though his cause was wider but history could not forgive him. So, if you work against your organisation, then nobody will respect you in the true sense. You will never receive any respect from your contemporaries.

Always Honour Your Commitment Absolutely

Always Honour Your Commitment Absolutely

 

We must work with high intensity and with a high commitment level. We can visualise our goal with proper direction and proper mindset. Our neurology has certain patterns. If these patterns are followed, then success is guaranteed. If we can provide information to our brain the way it wants, then we can see it, listen to the sound of it, and can feel it also. But for this, only
visualisation is not good enough. We have to take massive action also. Our intensity to produce the fire inside will make the entire world move around us.
If an individual makes a very high level of commitment to serve and to render high quality service, then he
is bound to be successful in every situation. Once I was in California for attending the firewalk seminar of Tony
Robbins. Around 12 o’ clock at night I went to the beach at Long beach, Los Angeles. When I was passing through the city centre while coming back, I saw that many strip
clubs and night clubs were open. I was able to figure out many scantily dressed girls standing along the roadside,
but nothing of that kind attracted me at the moment. I felt the importance of my wife who was alone at home in
India. In the process of the seminar, Tony had reinforced to connect with people who are deeply connected with their life. The significance of my wife Manju in my life
was so deep and intense that while my eyes were on the girls for a moment, my heart was with my wife. I felt the
importance of her suggestions which I used to ignore earlier. I notice that we seek suggestions from everywhere all over the world, but we ignore them when they come from

our near ones, specially our spouse. When I was in the trans state of mind, I realised that tears were rolling
down my cheeks and my voice was quivering. I realised that my success without her would be useless. I thank
Tony for uncovering the feeling which was deep inside me, but I was not aware of it. I would like to narrate another instance. I read a wonderful interview in Hindustan Times which was about Bikki Oberoi, son of the legendary Rai Bahadur Mohan Singh Oberoi. At the age of almost 78, he was so much energetic and committed. Once he was reading a complaint of a guest, who was from Hong Kong. He wrote a letter to the guest that he could stay for four days free of cost at any of the Oberoi Group of hotels in the world as per his
own convenience.

 The guest was taken care of and
felt that he was understood by the Chairman of the
Oberoi Group. He was given a true honour. Not
only this, the guest also got a refund of the entire
bill amount. There is a rule at Oberoi that all the
serious letters of complaint are forwarded to the
Chairman. Here commitment to serve the guest is visible.
The term, the “Guest is always right,” is highly practised
in the Oberoi group of hotels throughout the world.
Here you can feel that commitment is very strong. Vicky
Oberoi feels that there is no point in being arrogant at
any point of time to anybody if you are in the hospitality
industry. He looks forward to deliver what he has
committed to deliver. He believes in speaking silver and
delivering diamond. Arrogance in hospitality industry
doesn’t work.

Visualize What You Want To Be

Visualize What You Want To Be 

The state of your life is nothing more than a
          reflection of your state of mind.

                                                     Wayne Dyer

The key is to visualise the destination and not the path. Every day just visualise what you want to be and visualise that you have already achieved it. Your visualisation helps to clarify your deeds and needs. Once I was conducting a seminar in Haryana for Life Insurance Corporation of India. One of the participants, a very successful insurance consultant, came on the dais and shared a veryunique incident with everyone.

He said that one of his friends wanted to buy a car of a particular brand, design, and look, but he did not have money to buy it. He always visualised that he had purchased the car. But in reality he had not bought it. After some years he earned a lot of money and became a member of the LIC Gold Club. Then, when he went to
buy a car at the same showroom, the owner suggested him to buy the old model of the same car with huge discounts. Guess what happened? This was the same car that he used to visualise. It was not sold to any body. It was waiting for him. If you recall the reality of your belongings, you will always feel that whatever you have was made for you. How quickly you can get it depends upon how intense your visualisation is.